By
Anne T. Donahue - Celebrity News
Father's Day is upon us once again, and because holidays are nothing without being tied to television, we've used it as an excuse to rank dads. But not just any dads -- TV dads. The dads that gave us hope and instilled fear and even introduced us to types of resentment. (Here's looking at you, Danny Tanner, who literally defined "micromanagement.")
So without further adieu, here is the definitive ranking of TV dads, from worst to best. Happy Father's Day!
Walter White ("Breaking Bad")
Walter White (Bryan Cranston) may have started his meth empire to ensure his family had money after he died from cancer, but he was a liar (a damned liar). He did it for himself, and he said so himself. (And by "did it," we of course mean "mentally and emotionally abuse his family.")
Ward Cleaver ("Leave it to Beaver")
Honestly, any father who talks down to his kids and his wife as much as Ward (Hugh Beaumont) would be the type most of us would give dirty looks to in the grocery store. What makes you so special, Ward?
Tywin Lannister ("Game of Thrones")
Not only does Tywin (Charles Dance) love his incestuous twins Jaime (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) and Cersei (Lena Headey) more than son Tyrion (Peter Dinklage), he actively blames Tyrion for the death of his wife -- who died in childbirth. You would, you horrible dad. (Plus, even though Tywin accepts Jaime and Cersei, he still exercises far too much control over their lives.)
Dexter Morgan ("Dexter")
Dexter (Michael C. Hall) was a man who neglected his son so he could kill people. Next.
Don Draper ("Mad Men")
Don (Jon Hamm) tries, and he's damaged, sure. But even though he and Sally (Kiernan Shipka) have a beautiful bond, she also saw her father having sex with his neighbour. On the flip side, Don did buy Sally a puppy in season 1 -- but it was because he bailed on her birthday and left Betty serving a frozen Sara Lee. (Shameful.)
Mitch Leery ("Dawson's Creek")
Mitch Leery (John Wesley Shipp) died in a car accident after trying to pick an ice cream cone up from the car floor, presumably to eat it. He may have been the greatest dad in the world, but guess what: nobody cares now.
Fitzgerald Grant ("Scandal")
President Fitzgerald Grant (Tony Goldwyn) had a baby with a wife he doesn't love to maintain his political popularity. Yeah, what a winner.
Danny Tanner ("Full House")
He was obsessed with cleanliness which inevitably led to complexes in his children as they got older. (Also: too many "life lesson" speeches. Relax, guy.)
Al Bundy ("Married With Children")
Right smack in the middle. Why? Because Al Bundy (Ed O'Neill) is just an average guy trying his best. Kind of. Eh, he's fine.
Tim Taylor ("Home Improvement")
Yes, he was present with his kids (and actually seemed to like them), but Tim Taylor (Tim Allen) needed a lesson or two in feminism and/or the myth of male masculinity. Sports and tools don't make a man -- you can totally take your kids to a musical with your wife, dude.
Martin Crane ("Frasier")
The fact that Martin (John Mahoney) not only puts up with his terrible sons, but also regularly puts them in his place makes him Father of the Year. Give the man a second recliner.
Phil Dunphy ("Modern Family")
He embarrasses his children while trying to be cool because he loves them. On the flip side, he embarrasses his children while trying to be cool (maybe because he secretly hates them, we don't know).
George Jefferson ("The Jeffersons")
The man built a dynasty upon dry cleaning stores, and despite his sometimes-surliness, George Jefferson (Sherman Hemsley) obviously cared. Because here's the thing: anyone with that much drive and family dedication is entitled to being a little tuckered out from time to time. Especially when trying to parent a teenage son.
Bob Belcher ("Bob's Burgers")
He makes delicious burgers and supports his children's dreams. The only downside is his lack of support for Louise's clever burger nicknames. (Just go with them, Bob.)
Louis CK ("Louie")
Louis might actually be one of the most underrated dads on television: trying his best religiously, he gives a realistic glimpse into what raising two daughters is like. It's difficult, rewarding, but more importantly, very entertaining for anyone not involved.
Dan Conner ("Roseanne")
Pro: Dan Conner (John Goodman) was a tolerate, patient, kind dad. Con: the "Roseanne" finale made us question everything we knew, meaning there was a chance he wasn't actually like that at all. Because life is unfair.
Graham Chase ("My So-Called Life")
ABC "But Mr. Chase (Tom Irwin) was an amazing dad!" you argue. "Why wouldn't you place him higher on the list?" Easy: because, if "My So-Called Life" hadn't been prematurely cancelled, it was set up that he might cheat on his wife. And not to judge, but that's Don Draperville, U.S.A.
Cliff Huxtable ("The Cosby Show")
. In one episode, Cliff Huxtable (Bill Cosby) offered a reality check to his children that rivals even the best-written AMC monologue: "This isn't Burger King. You can't have it your way." Ladies and gentlemen, the original mic drop.
Uncle Phil ("Fresh Prince of Bel-Air")
When Will (Will Smith) arrived from West Philadelphia, Uncle Phil (James Avery) stepped up: he was more of a dad than Will's biological father ever was, incorporating Will into a life he wouldn't have known if the then-teen had stayed on the playground, (where he spent most of his days). We miss you, James Avery.
Eric Taylor ("Friday Night Lights")
Coach Taylor (Kyle Chandler) defines "there." As in "being there." And "there for you." And "there there, stop crying, it's just a TV show, Eric Taylor isn't real." But we sure wish he was.
Homer Simpson ("The Simpsons")
Sure, he's clueless sometimes, but remember the episode where Homer bonded with Bart over the soapbox cars? Or when he tried to attend the opera to impress Lisa? He tries! He's an every-dad! And, according to the post about his nuclear reactor station, he even keeps his horrible job for Maggie. ("Do it for her." Tears.)
Keith Mars ("Veronica Mars")
A single father whose mandate is to do the right thing, Keith Mars (Enrico Colantoni) not only believes and believes in Veronica (Kristen Bell), he puts her needs above his own -- without being a doormat, or being taken advantage of. A dad for all of us. A dad for the books. A dad who's currently trying to support Veronica's choice to follow in his P.I. footsteps. (If you watched the "Veronica Mars" movie, which is a great Father's Day choice.)
Who do you think is the best (or worst) dad on TV? Sound off in the comments below, and Happy Father's Day!
